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I’m up hanging out with my friend before she gets married. We are going through all the old pictures of her and I. While I’m still so much bigger than I was then I’m so thankful I’m not as big as I was 3 months ago. I haven’t eaten well this weekend but I’ve made sure to get my exercise in. It’s become part of my day no matter where I am.

I’m reading all the stuff the top 6 get todo….oh I so hope I get in. The leadership weekend is exactly what I need in my life right now. To surround myself with 11 other women who have been empowered by this challenge would be amazing. My nerves are racked….I didn’t lose as much in segment 2 and I need to not only have lost the most of the 3 but also more than the average of the 15.

Stay tuned Tuesday night for the results! Best of luck to all those vying for a spot in the top6…..i don’t envy the board having to choose only 6 from a group where everyone deserves it.

Fingers crossed!!!!!!

 

 

Created on 2017-04-10 22:04:30

I made top 3!!! Oh gosh that felt good. I so want to be the wildcard. I’ll be leaving a wedding to get back in time for the party. I can’t miss it. After what I’ve done with the challenge the last 12 weeks I have to see it through.  My friend not understands but says she’ll have security escort me out if I don’t leave in time. Or maybe she said she’d buy me an escort if I stayed. Oh well.

I’ve now lost 15% of my body weight.  Back in January I thought losing the weight I needed would take a year or more….I now am setting my goal for summer! I’m so amazed that I am actually doing it. The right way….no pills, no shots or drops…just plain and simple diet and exercise.

 

 

Created on 2017-04-05 15:42:58

Well today is the day I find out if I made the 3 wildcards…..I’m pretty confident I did. I think there are only a few of us with numbers to do it. The hard part will be getting the ONE spot…hopefully with positive thoughts I will persevere.  That’s all I can do at this point, the rest is done, it’s the final stretch.  What an exhilarating competition.

 

Omg it’s amazing seeing the spots in voting change so dramatically.  It’s anyone’s game at this point.  Please people if you have a horse in the race don’t stop voting, they need you more than ever.

Created on 2017-04-04 14:08:28

Oh my…even though I’m not in the voting it’s so stressful…so few spots and so many deserving ladies! I know everyone already has won so many amazing things that no matter what we are so muc b farther ahead than we were two months ago.  Life changing to see how much things can change in such a short time if you put your mind to it.

I’m so excited and nervous to hear the wildcard announcement.  To be given a chance at getting back into this contest is more than I could have asked. The dates will just have to work, this has become my top priority and I will give it 100% of my schedule if I’m chosen. I’ve been sick yesterday and today so sadly I couldn’t muster the energy to excercise.  I’ve only been out of bed 5hours and and so exhausted.

If anyone is reading this and hasn’t voted, please go do so.

Created on 2017-04-03 02:04:27

Last night’s weigh in was surprisingly great. I’m feeling really good and excited to try for another good week.

I’m choosing an attitude of gratefulness this week. It’s easy to hear negative comments and cattyness among the groups. But if you listen closer and look deeper into things you see will all the positive that has affected all of us. Trying on clothes last night you could see so many women overjoyed with the work they had done.

Yes the fundraising is hard but because the ladies did it last year we got to have this opportunity.  Because we did it this year next year 30 lives will be changed. We really only get to see the tip of the iceberg that the challenge is so it’s easy to only think about ourselves.  We don’t see how many hours, weeks or even months it take to line up the sponsors, to plan the events and to keep everything running on track. Aside from the faces we see every Tuesday there are also many more board members working behind the scenes. So today my gratitude is for all them. Without the TMC I would be still eating a brownie feeling sorry for myself.  Instead I am accountable, empowered and determined to keep going. Thank you!

Created on 2017-03-29 15:23:17

Well last night was our big fundraiser.  What a great time we had. Sure there were a few bumps but overall I think we did pretty good. Teamwork really showed well and we even raised a few dollars for the causes. The dazzling divas deserve a pat on the back. Great job ladies!

Well I’ve done a fairy mediocre job on diet this week. Friday was bad, I ate osso bucco for lunch and wine and charcuterie for dinner. Plus only squeezed in a 20 minute work out. But Saturday was good. No time to eat or drink at the fundraiser.

Created on 2017-03-26 15:40:55

Yesterday was a good day! I kept on track…I ate well…I stayed full so I didn’t give into temptation. Today should be good too. I’ll have time to make a lunch and I get to be home for dinner. Yay!

Created on 2017-03-23 15:13:21

Well that was a lesson well learned. I didn’t lose anything this week. Because I had or two nights of “cheating” the week before and still lost I guess I pushed the limit to see if I could get away with four. The answer is a big resounding no. I definitely flattened one of my tires. At a point where I only have two weeks left to make the wildcard this was a colossal mistake.

With a crazy busy week ahead this will be a challenge.  The next night I’ll get to tuck my kids in will be Monday so that hour I get between jobs has to be spent with them rather than on the bike. So I here I am biking at 530am. Then upstairs to meal prep before the kids get up. Not going to lie…I’ve been neglecting it and I had drive through breakfast twice last week.

I’ve done the math and know I’m behind..so heres to having a great week with 100% accountability.

Created on 2017-03-22 12:34:06

This has been the longest week of the challenge…it’s been a bad week for eating healthy…my dad was in town plus I went to the suite at the Canucks game twice so I ate and drank like a rockstar…but I tried really hard to balance it….I made it very high priority to get my exercise in. I ate as much salad earlier in the day when I knew I would make bad choices at night. I made sure not to go hungry in the days I was “saving calories” for night….I just had very healthy breakfasts…egg white with shrimp and things like that. The scale will let me know if it worked.

I did fit into a size 14 pants today.. I remember when I bought them, I said they would be my biggest pants ever..oh how stupid I was back then.  I have so many more tools of knowledge this time around. I’m surprised that I’ve lost the same weight in almost the same time period as when I did hcg…only this time I’m full all the time. The support and cheerleader I’ve encountered are amazing and life changing.

Created on 2017-03-21 23:28:07

Oh blog….did you miss me? Seems like forever. The time is going way too fast…it’s been 3 weigh ins since the last segment. I’ve been doing okay..about 1.5 pounds per week….nothing amazing but going the right way. I’m still living life, I’m not starving, I still drink wine, I’m waiting for my bacon cheeseburger now.. for me it’s balance. It’s making sure I excercise and don’t have the burger or wine every single day.

I’m so happy that I stuck it out..I’m just seeing the results after 8 weeks….my clothes fit better, some are baggy…others that sat in the closet for years are fitting. I feel thinner. I have the wiggle back in my walk. The work really does pay off. For those reading that get discouraged when they don’t see results, hang in there. It takes time but it does work.

Created on 2017-03-15 18:55:44

What surprises me most is how light I feel. I have a skip in my step. I feel energetic and happy. I get sad when I miss my workout. I’m becoming a much kinder person. These endorphin things might have some merit.

I didn’t limit myself at the beer festival on Friday, while I did stay away from the beer I found myself at the gorgonzolla bacon table a lot. Damn you bacon and the control you yield over me! Up 3 pounds haha…no regrets I love you bacon.

Created on 2017-03-11 16:20:25

Weigh in went great…down another 1.8. I don’t expect I’ll see the big numbers I did in the beginning but I will happily take slow steady loss..(so long as it’s greater than everyone else’s) ;)

I wore the pants that you see on the left in that sexy picture…I didn’t have to undue the button to pull them down! My jacket fits great….I am loving this journey so much….I have no idea why I waited so long but I know I’m not waiting another minute to keep going.

Created on 2017-03-08 17:22:39

I’m starting to notice a difference!! My jacket actually fits well…..before it was so snug on the hips I had trouble doing it up. When I’m on my recumbent bike there is actually a small gap between my thighs! It’s paying off and I feel amazing…..I’m sleeping well…I’m have energy….I’m making more alert and present. So grateful for the push that TMC gave me….tonight is weigh in…..I’ve had a good week so let’s hope the scale reflects how I feel.

Created on 2017-03-07 15:12:36

Well you may have noticed I haven’t blogged in a few days….something came up and I had to drop out. Ive been feeling a bit sad and lost. Not enough to give up of course. I’m not sure I even qualify to try for wildcard. I’m going to play like I am anyway.  The void I am feeling needs to find a healthy fill. I missed the meeting on Tuesday because I had to work at the Canucks game which of course led to Pizza and 3 bottles of wine. I worked double shifts three days this week so barely squeezed in a workout. My scale is reflecting this….I must stay on track…when I can’t eat right I must excercise more and vise versa. I’m not even sure if I’m still allowed to blog….well, my page is still here so I’ll just keep it up until they get a restraining order against me. Here’s to a healthier me, even without the top 15 :)

Created on 2017-03-04 03:32:08

Another amazing day to be alive! I woke up this morning feeling guilty that I have to go straight to an event after work I wouldn’t get a chance to excercise.  So I strapped the kids in their chairs for breakfast and got 30 minutes on the bike done….ahhh….how nice to get that out of the way…..maybe I’ll even get home a few minutes early to sneak in another 30.

I’m missing the meeting tonight because of work..I was really looking forward to see all the wildcard contenders going strong. Oh well, next week. I’m going to pop by Chilliwack for my measures….hopefully I’m down a little. Fingers crossed…….

Created on 2017-02-28 18:28:08

What a weekend! The amazing race was so well done. I’m in awe of the amount of work and organization that goes into that. The awards were great, what a lot of prizes. And I made the top 15! Blown away by the support. I get another six weeks on this amazing journey with these awesome ladies.

Created on 2017-02-27 17:02:29

Edited on 2017-03-01 19:37:47

Well thank goodness that’s over..for now. I was very humbled by the push of my friends on the last few days. They got me into the 14th spot.  Now I just have to keep the weight loss going.

I am currently now at 25 pounds. With still about 75 to go. Wow a quarter done already!! Thanks TMC.

Created on 2017-02-23 16:03:28

So easy to get off course … yesterday was good although I didn’t get to excercise..will be challenging to find time today as well. Gotta squeeze it in.

If you’re readingthis please vote for me…time is running out and I’m still behind ..

Created on 2017-02-21 16:10:19

OK…

Pity party is over! Time to make the changes I need and get this s..t done.

It sure felt good to exercise yesterday after 2 days off. I’m starting to understand how people get addicted to it.

I didn’t look at the voting or the scale.Im sure it’s all fine…

Created on 2017-02-20 17:09:24

Well disregard that last post…my computer must have glitched….still in 23….I’ve expanded my efforts. Fingers crossed..

I know a positive attitude is what’s going to win this but I feel I need to share even when I’m down. And today I’m really down.  Yesterday we did the big seminar.  I felt pretty good throughout afterwards I felt light, elated and took away alot of really positive tools. Then at 3am while I’m comforting my teething son the drawing excercise came back to me. We were put in groups of 5 and told to decide on 3 of us to die and 2 to live. I argued my case first. I thought with 2 under 2 I would be an easy choice to live. Two others also had very compelling  reasons and desire to live. Because my children have a great father I was chosen to die. We then made peace with that and rationalized all the reasons my family would be better off with me dead. I was OK with the decision and actually felt good about saving the two we chose.  Obviously they don’t actually kill us in the seminar so now I’m at home trying to find reasons to the opposite and I don’t have four other people helping find these reasons.

I’ve gained 4 pounds over the weekend.

OK…now that I’ve vented all that it’s time to pull myself together like a dungbettle and get myself focused again.

Created on 2017-02-19 17:13:20

I spent most of yesterday in tears, shattered and discouraged. I briefly moved up to spot 21, then quickly back to 23. I had friends saying they were voting but the polls were not in my favor. I couldn’t sleep. It was making me sick, I wanted to give up. I drank a bunch of wine and ate chocolate.  I felt like I was back in high school and being rejected.  I finally couldn’t lay awake stewing on it anymore so I got up. It’s 330am. Tomorrow is going to suck. I logged into the voting site. I’m number 4!! Thank you friends!! I’m overwhelmed with support. I do now feel bad that I dove so fast into that dark place. I also feel sad because someone else now has spot 23. We must all remember we are winners on the right track.  We all are shrinking in size and growing in strength and character. The seminar is amazing so far..I can’t wait till tomorrow..I love everyone involved in this experience with me.

Created on 2017-02-18 11:49:34

Edited on 2017-02-18 11:50:49

Day 2 of voting and im in the 23rd spot….popularity contests are clearly not my strong suit. Whatever. I know I have some amazing people trying very hard to get me to the next level. I does look like I had the highest weight loss so I’ll have to count on that.

 

Created on 2017-02-17 16:11:14

It’s 515 in the morning and I’m up stressed thinking about how I will exercise later because we have the seminar this evening.  Am I really going to get up and do it now? It’s 515 in the f*%#ing morning. Roosters don’t even get up this early….and roosters are cocks.

Weigh in last night put me at 19.2 pounds lost so far. I’ll take that. I’m 1/5 of the way done :).

Created on 2017-02-15 13:33:25

Edited on 2017-02-15 13:33:59

Oh no! My last few blog posts didn’t save… oh well….what a fun weekend I had….I poured at a wine festival on Saturday night where a very drunk couple wanted to take me home with them…..I obviously look good to them…yippee! I had done an extra 10 minutes of cardiovascular earlier that day because I knew I wanted wine and cheese….in fact I really felt like I wasn’t on a diet all weekend…I ate a lot! And not the best choices either….I went to a 2yr olds birthday party and ate a hotdogs and cheese platter, yes, the whole cheese platter. Those who know me are not surprised by that…..today is the most important weigh in day of the first stage….I of course just peaked at my home scale…I’m down a couple pounds! Yay!! Can’t wait to see the true numbers tonight. My jeans are falling off me…..I even went into that pile we all have in the back of our closets and tried some of those on…they fit!! Well some of them……the rest will soon….the more I eat the more I lose….I’m finally getting it!!

Created on 2017-02-14 16:17:37

Damn you Murphey and your stupid law book. It was so great to see my neighbors all get together last night and shovel the whole street….just as we finished, our backs almost too sore to grab a beer, tea for me, the snow plow another Neighbor hired showed up! Oh well…..hopefully I gained some core strength..

 

Yesterday I was pretty good on my fiber intake..my protein was really high 145grams….egg whites really are amazing..plus I did my stationary bike so fingers crossed…this Tuesday is the weight that matters…no.pressure!

Created on 2017-02-10 16:03:15

Yesterday I changed my diet to include more fiber and carbs…yes, carbs…the scary word that every fad diet tells us is the devil. I went with a sprouted grain bread and it’s delicious…I filled my face all day and had trouble hitting my protein goal..after dinner I even had to have a power bar. Hopefully the scale keeps tipping.

I’m stuck at home again, I’ve missed work this whole week.  I’m fortunate that my boss is awesome.  Although being commission sales this is not ideal. Plus I have such a respect for stay at home moms. My 2 year old decided to paint me a lovely mural on his crib and the wall behind. His medium: fecal matter. So I tossed the poo covered monkey in a few inches of water in the tub while I got on my bio hazmat suit to start cleaning. Sounds like he’s having too much fun so I peek and he’s made a navy fleet out of an entire package of toilet paper rolls I carelessly left beside the tub. I get a new diaper on him and go get him some fresh clothes. I return to find his hair slicked back like John Travolta from the tub of Vaseline……can I PLEASE  go back to work!!!

Created on 2017-02-09 15:39:29

My subdivision still isn’t plowed….I took hubby’s car to the meeting as it has snow tires…I felt like I was driving a rally car. My van doesn’t stand a chance. F@*K!

I was down .4 at last night’s weigh in..not great but I’ll take it over a gain.

People keep asking me what my goal is. Do I want to be as skinny as I was when I lived in Mexico and did an 8 ball a day?…no I do not. Do I want to be so skinny I can wear a 10 year old boys pants?..no. I want to be healthy and not out of breath coming up my stairs. I want to be able to sit on the toilet without prying my butt cheeks open with my hands. Has anyone seen my vagina lately? Where the hell did I leave that thing? Bottom line, I want to be healthy, curvy and natural with enough energy to participate in my life and my kids life.

Created on 2017-02-08 10:55:25

Snow days were much more fun when I didn’t care if I consumed 2000 calories worth of booze in a day. But it’s weigh in day and not giving in. My home scale seems to think I’m down a couple pounds :). I’m so astonished how the weight is coming off because this group of amazing ladies keeps me accountable. I’m feeling really good today. The fold over flap on my belly might pass the pencil test soon!

Created on 2017-02-07 14:25:18

Ugh….I know I’m supposed to love myself and chant how beautiful I am but it’s so hard when I  see the candid picim s my neighbor just posted from last night. Most times I don’t realize I’m as big as I am.  Then I see these pics. …

I’m still eating too much fat..because it’s so friggen delicious….I found a half box of Purdy chocolates in the cupboard yesterday, I ate one….only one….well I token a tiny bite of 4 of them before deciding which one I wanted to eat whole. I don’t feel bad about that…I didn’t eat the whole box like I would have before.

I’m still snowed in…it’s my usual paperwork from home day anyway….hopefully a plow will consider coming down my street today.

 

Created on 2017-02-06 11:15:05

Snowed in…they don’t plow our subdivision….my son is not a fan of the snow in person. He enjoys looking out the window at it yelling “nooo”.  My scale at home hasn’t moved in a week but that’s OK…I’m not in this for fast loss….slow and steady this time. I had a couple great weeks and as long as I’m not bouncing back up I’m happy. I was misreading the label on a protein bar and missing some hidden sugars so now that I know that things will only get better. I bumped my cardiovascular up by 10 minutes and burned 12000 calories shoveling snow. OK I might be exaggerating because the lower mainland version of fitness pal does not recognize shoveling snow as an activity. I would have to download the Alberta version.

Created on 2017-02-05 11:17:58

Yesterday was so amazing…I chose to stay home from work and was just tinkering around the house when I got a friend request from one of the ladies. Within minutes she was chatting with me, encouraging me to join a group at yoga. How amazing that while we are in a competition we are encouraging one another rather than tripping each other up. It’s very cool to be a part of the group. All different races, backgrounds, ages, sizes with one common goal. To better people tomorrow than we are today. Thank you TMC!

Created on 2017-02-04 11:25:10

Ahhh Friday……I love Friday..I don’t have to rush to get out the door….I’ll have a chance to hit the gym. what more could a girl want.

Yesterday I had my one on one with the life coach. I felt so great being able to open up to someone who isn’t pre disposed to my life. It was great to hear that I’m on the right track and that my biggest problem is actually a pretty easy fix. She pegged a few things right on and I plan to implement changes starting today, well yesterday but I was too busy living life to blog yesterday.

I am so grateful for this challenge it makes my heart feel like it will burst with fullness. I love who I’m becoming.

Created on 2017-02-03 11:15:23

I wasn’t up! Last night’s weigh in I was actually down another 3.6 pounds….Holy pooh bear…I’m doing it!

The life coach was inspiring and real she helped us get to know everyone a bit better. All 30 of us really are amazing! I don’t envy the judges who have to cut half of us in a few weeks.

 

Created on 2017-02-01 10:27:24

I got hit on last night! Me! Well obviously what little weight I’ve lost hasn’t had time to show up in my appearance so it must be my new energy he was attracted to. Whatever the reason it felt good.

Last night we were at a pub and not only was I not tempted by everyone’s fish and chips, I actually thought all the grease looked quite disgusting.  We were there to organize our team for this year’s Ride to Conquer Cancer. I have committed myself to riding a pedal bike from Cloverdale to Seattle. Gulp. That poor bicycle. My goal is to be 60 pounds lighter by then. With this challenge and then cycling training beginning in the spring I’m positive I’ll make it. Look out world here I come.

Created on 2017-01-31 10:52:10

Ahhh Monday….Monday is my “paperwork ” day….which really means I’m too poor to have my nanny in 5 days a week so I tell my boss is stay home to do paperwork….I think she’s on to me since every Monday she gets an email from my 2 year old in a language neither of us quite understand.  I wish the gym had a daycare…I’ve still only been once :(. I did go to yoga again yesterday…..my lower back was in so much pain the stretching made me cry hopefully in a good way.

My friend of many years is moving to Ireland and is obviously clearing out her house as she keeps posting pictures of me at 19 or 20.. If only I had known how beautiful I was then. I won’t make that mistake again, even though I am fat it doesn’t make me less beautiful. I am making the decision to stop hiding from the camera …fat or not, this is me and I love me.

Created on 2017-01-30 11:03:45

Yesterday I spent the day at the Sheraton Talks events. While it wasn’t quite what I had pictured in my mind I was able to listen to 16 brave women who turned their lives around. Many of them my age or older when they made that first step. Such a positive environment.

Even though I shouldn’t, I’ve been stepping on my home scale.  I have gained a few pounds since last weigh in. After my big loss I stepped on the tenita scale and it showed I hadn’t actually lost any fat…I was losing muscle. Even though I didn’t feel hungry, I wasn’t eating enough. I had noticed my milk supply slowing down too. I have since kicked up my calories and milk is flowing again, I feel alive and energetic.  I was even able to run after my toddler in the park yesterday.. and that guy can move! So even it came with the gain of a few pounds I want to do this right. I have done those crash diets and sure I rapidly lost 30 or 40 pounds, it came back. This time it’s not a diet. It’s a lifestyle and I need to find my balance.

Gotta go, it’s yoga time :)

 

Created on 2017-01-29 12:26:19

Oh my, the blogs are here. A day I’ve been dreading and anticipating.  The last time I kept a diary I was 13 and my mom found it. She hasn’t liked me since.

I Guess it’s almost 2 weeks into the challenge..I feel better than I have in years, I’m eating better, I go to bed at a reasonable hour I haven’t had a glass of wine in 2 weeks! I’m going on a reward today that I won for being the second biggest loser. Yet I feel like I’m so far behind. The other women in this challenge are amazing, they are so positive and motivated…literally some of them are in the gym 3 or more hours a day. I admire them so much….I just snuck away from work for 45 minutes yesterday to hit the gym for the first time. I have to do better, I cannot let this opportunity pass me by. This is the best shot I have. I am currently pretending to be still asleep so my two year old doesn’t come try to help me type…my nine months old is beside me criticizing my choice of earrings for the day. I love my life and every day I am becoming more present in it. 

Created on 2017-01-28 11:14:37